62 Truths. A Letter to Xai Alexandr

You won't remember this day. You might not even be able to focus your eyes on this page yet. That's fine. I'm not writing for the baby in my arms. I'm writing for the man you'll grow into, the one who needs to hear these things from someone who meant every word before you were old enough to talk back.

I'm not going to soften the truth to make childhood easier. Life isn't fair, and pretending otherwise would only hurt you later. I'd rather hand you the truth now and let you grow strong around it.

So here are 62 things, Xai Alexandr. Not rules. Just what your mother and I want you to carry.

Read them once. Then again, someday, when you actually need them.

Before anything else, believe in yourself. Everyone else's belief only shows up after yours does, never before.

1. Believe in yourself first. Everyone else's belief shows up after yours does, never before.
2. Trust your gut, no matter what. It usually knows before your head does.
3. Trust yourself, even when it's different from what your mother and I think. We didn't raise you to agree with us. We raised you to think for yourself.
4. If someone says you're different, you are fucking different. Full stop. And that's exactly what your mother and I wanted for you.
5. It's okay to get called crazy. Most of the time, it just means you're early.
6. Confidence is key. Walk into rooms like you belong there, because you do.
7. There's nothing for you to prove. Not to me, not to your mother, not to anyone watching.
8. Some people will never see your worth, and that's okay. Your mother and I already know exactly what you're made of. That's all the proof you need.
9. Someone, somewhere, will try to steal your joy. Don't hand it over for free.
10. Whether you appreciate art is up to you, including if you want a tattoo. Just remember, cleanliness is next to godliness.
11. Your mother and I are already proud of you. That part was decided a long time ago, no conditions attached.

Power isn't loud. Most of the time, it's quiet. It is the truth you tell, the things you don't say, the energy you learn to read.

1. Tell the truth. It's the policy that never goes out of style, no matter how much easier a lie looks in the moment.
2. "Fake it till you make it" is a lie. When you don't know something, say so. Ask for help. Listen to people with more experience than you, as long as you still know right from wrong.
3. Knowledge is power. Learn everything you can. No one can take it from you once it's yours.
4. Energy is different from words. Learn to read it. People can say one thing and carry another.
5. Don't judge a book by its cover. Remember that.
6. Silence is power. You don't owe the room your thoughts. Keep some things for yourself.
7. Don't give away what puts you ahead. Share your wisdom freely. Guard your edge.
8. Nothing is ever really free. People always want something back, and not always something material. Read The 48 Laws of Power.

Life is unfair. Period. Waiting for it to change is wasted time. Get strong instead.

1. Life shows no mercy. Don't expect any. Just keep standing.
2. Your mother and I would rather get a call about something you did than a call because someone hurt you. Stand up for yourself. Always.
3. If someone throws a rock at you, throw a bigger one back. Don't start fights. But never lose one someone else started.
4. When someone truly comes for you, don't go halfway. Mercy is something you choose to give, not something anyone can force out of you.
5. Don't get yourself killed over an argument. Cowards survive. Always.
6. Mommy and I let you learn muay thai, but you're always just one bullet away from losing everything anyway. If it ever comes down to your things or your life, give up the things. Money can be earned back. Life can't.
7. Burn the bridge. Friends, coworkers, even mommy and daddy. If you ever feel disrespected, you're allowed to walk away for good.

Toughness means nothing if you're not around to use it.

1. A sharp mind beats a strong body, but you still need the strong body too. Train both. One protects the other.
2. Drink, if you choose to, in moderation. A clear head is worth more than a good buzz.
3. Don't do drugs. You will ruin your fucking life. It's tempting when you're depressed, stressed, or even when you're winning. You don't want to end up behind bars while everyone else is out there driving flying cars.
4. You'll hear about psychedelics. Once is enough. Twice is asking for trouble.
5. If you're in a hurry behind the wheel, slow down. You cannot win a race against death. No one ever has.
6. If you're ever in doubt about food, throw it out. Don't poison yourself over leftovers.

Money matters. Don't be greedy with it.

1. Money matters. Don't be greedy with it. Give when you can. What goes around really does come back around.
2. Don't gamble. You already have what you have. Why risk losing it on a bet?
3. Don't treat your coworkers like family. There's no such thing as family at work. Learn that boundary early.
4. Don't shit where you eat, especially at work.
5. If a great opportunity comes, take it. Don't let the paycheck decide for you.
6. Do what you love. Study what you love. A life spent doing the wrong thing well is still the wrong thing.
7. Don't believe everything the internet tells you about "loving what you do." Follow your own heart and your own gut. That's the only path that actually leads there.
8. We live in a country where people will tell you a diploma doesn't matter, that street smarts are enough. That's a lie dressed up as wisdom. Get both.
9. We live in a world of AI, robotics, and space travel. If you're ever offered a seat to the moon or Mars, don't think twice. Say yes.

If your heart gets broken, that's okay. It means you loved with everything you had. That's not a failure.

1. If your heart gets broken, that's okay. It means you loved with everything you had. That's not a failure.
2. If you fall in love, tell us. We'll make sure you know how to stay safe. No judgment, just love.
3. Practice safe sex. No exceptions, no shortcuts, no excuses.
4. Listen to your wife. Really listen. It will save you more arguments than you'll ever know.
5. Be the best version of yourself. That's the only way to make her want to stay.
6. You don't owe anyone anything. Not even us. Period. Love that's freely given is the only kind worth having.

Respect everyone. Be humble, especially with people who have less than you. That's the real test of character.

1. Respect everyone. Be humble, especially with people who have less than you. That's the real test of character, not how you treat people above you.
2. Take care of yourself first. Family second. Not because they don't matter, but because you can't give what you don't have.
3. Don't worry about taking care of your mother and me. That's our job to do for you. When you become a father yourself, you'll understand, and you'll do the same for your own children.
4. Don't worry about mommy and daddy. We made a promise to each other, till death do us part. That's ours to carry, not yours.
5. Your mother and I will take care of each other. That was never going to be your job.
6. If you ever build your own family, the order changes. Your child comes first, your wife comes next, and you come last. That's what it means to be a father.
7. Always respect people with disabilities. Never harm them. Karma is patient. It doesn't only hit you, it can hit the people you love too.

Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Today.

1. Stay where you are. Not yesterday, not tomorrow, today. That's the only place life actually happens.
2. Believe in yin and yang, in balance. Being willing to see the other side of things, even the opposite of what you believe, will always keep you humble.

Go enjoy life. Collect experiences. That's what fills up a life, not things.

1. High school friends are the best friends you'll ever have. No doubt about it.
2. Go enjoy life. Collect experiences. That's what fills up a life, not things.
3. Be as grateful as you can. I'm living proof that gratitude gives you back so much, in ways you don't expect.

Pray. Believe in God.

1. Pray. Believe in God. Don't chase things that cost you your spirit just to win at life. The world is hard enough without losing yourself too.
2. If you ever lose your way chasing a career, remember the name we gave you, Xai Alexandr. We didn't choose it by accident. Let it pull you back when you drift.
3. I haven't figured all of this out myself. I'm still learning most of it as I go. But I loved you before I ever heard your voice, and I'll keep living these words, not just writing them, for as long as I'm around to do it.

You won't remember this day. But one day, you'll read it again, and maybe, by then, you won't need to.

Welcome, Xai Alexandr. The world is real. Go meet it standing up.

Your father (and your mother, in everything marked ours)