Curiosity in the Darkness

2015 was a year that really hit hard.

A crisis in the Middle East made my dad come back home. We started to run out of money. School became something you could choose to do, whereas survival became something that had to be done.

I even considered becoming a priest. Yes, seriously. I imagined priests got donations from rich people and thought that if I were one maybe that could help us. I even asked God for a sign, but what I got was complete silence.

So, I took my first step into what was supposed to be the adult world. I applied and got hired. It felt like a win, but I was young, curious, and restless. Even though I was a part of the corporate grind, I could still see the same things:

• The ways in which people behave under stressful situations.
• The unnoticeable hierarchies.
• The indirect hints that reveal the nature of a person’s character.

The smallest actions are the ones that show the biggest truths. If you look nearer, they will reveal themselves to you.

Then came 2017, one of the most transformative years of my life. I deep dive into:

• Shogun Method
• Seduction
• Neuro-Linguistic Programming
• The psychology of attraction

It did so much to open my mind about people’s thoughts, the way influence works, and how feelings are there even though people are not aware of them. People experience the same, don’t they, the invisible forces that pull them.

I even applied a little of Derek Rake’s Shogun Method. That’s how I pulled my partner, being direct yet understanding, from the very moment I saw her.

Disclaimer: This isn't sponsored; it’s a true story. However, a word of caution: If you choose to decide/read this material, you must consider the ethics. There are real consequences and dangers involved when applying these concepts to actual people.

I was living in a dorm room by myself, and life really took it hard on me. I even thought about taking my own life. I was feeling suffocated with my own thoughts.

I sent messages to my friends, Saj, Nek, Dlor, and two more. They were just one phone call away, and they never left me alone. I am very thankful to them for this. Sorry Mom and Dad and to my brothers if you ever happen to read this.

While I was looking for something that could give me support, I came across a book by Eckhart Tolle called The Power of Now through Google. That’s how I learned and I always say the power in the present moment.

You know that feeling when you find yourself looking at something, but you don't think of anything? Your mind is just blank? If you have ever experienced that feeling, then you must read this book.

That insight turned out to be my first lifeline to myself again. Even though I was in a very bad situation, I learned that if you reach out to someone, you will survive.

POKER

Somewhere in this storm, I discovered Texas Hold’em. And I got good, really good. I earned more than $2,000 online on PokerStars. Poker sharpened my logic and patience.

But the real reason I got into poker wasn’t just money. I want to fuck someone, I want to date someone, and you can't do all of that without money. I wanted to apply everything I learned from The Game, The Art of Seduction, and the Shogun Method.

I wanted to test the theories, influence, patience, observation.

Every card dealt is a choice. Every choice changes you.

Notice.